Funny, isn't it how we play little games with ourselves. Take for example my pride in fitting into a pair of size 2 jeans. Truth is, when I finally pried myself back out of them I checked the little size tag. Pooey, the number is a 4, twice the equivalent of the number 2. Obviously, these particular jeans are the slim cut because they are a lot slimmer than my other size 4 full cut and my size 4 stretch jeans. What does size mean anyway?
So it goes with other things we make a big issue about when in the world of importance they are low on the list of priorities. Being heavily involved with a local women's sailboat racing series has brought some trivialities to the forefront. Several women have told me they are discouraged by the yelling of their captain. "He's demeaning. His sarcasm makes me feel stupid." I know not everyone has done half the research I have on how people learn, but I'm always amazed that people allow their instructors attitude to make them feel insecure.
Eleanor Roosevelt is quoted as saying, "No one can make you feel insecure without your permission." I say if the captain uses a tone of voice I don't like, I tell him. Dr. Phil is right when he says we teach people how to treat us. So ladies, the next time your captain bellows something like, "Wake up, HELLLLOOOOO, what are you doing?" Just smile and say, "I'm wondering if you really believe your attitude is helping us learn." Or, give him/her back the same tone. "Oh, so you graduated from the school of sarcasm and majored in how to coach a team to last place."
More importantly, learn what you can. Forget the words and ask yourself, what is my coach wanting me to do. Maybe, just maybe, if I get it right, he/she will shut up. :-) :-) :-)
See you on the water, or at the Melbourne West Marine on S. Sarno Road, Tuesday, Sept. 23 at 6:30 pm.
Sass the sailor,
Marlene
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